More Rules For Writers

I’m sure many have seen this before, but given what I read out on the internet, it bears repeating. In addition, I can also use the reminders myself.

************

  1. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
  2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
  3. And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.
  4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
  5. Avoid cliches like the plague.  (They’re old hat)
  6. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
  7. Be more or less specific.
  8. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
  9. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
  10. No sentence fragments.
  11. Contractions aren’t necessary and shouldn’t be used.
  12. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
  13. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.
  14. One should NEVER generalize.
  15. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
  16. Don’t use no double negatives.
  17. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
  18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
  19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
  20. The passive voice is to be ignored.
  21. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary.  Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
  22. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
  23. Kill all exclamation points!!!
  24. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
  25. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth shaking ideas.
  26. Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed.
  27. Eliminate quotations.  As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations.  Tell me what you know.”
  28. If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
  29. Puns are for children, not groan readers.
  30. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
  31. Even IF a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
  32. Who needs rhetorical questions?
  33. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

And finally…

34.  Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Organized Living Essentials
    Apr 29, 2012 @ 21:49:51

    I tweeted this out to the online writing world because this so worth reviewing. The essence and integrity of writing rules still need to be followed despite Twitter and texting. “We, can’t forget, the rules of, written communiation”!!!!!!! Oops. Used, a contraction, quotation marks, ecessive exclamation points, too many commas and a one word sentence just now.

    Reply

    • Lloyd's of Rochester
      Apr 29, 2012 @ 22:32:00

      😉 Yeah, that’s me, too. I found that in one of my “collection” documents and knew I had to share it. Exclamation points and parentheses are my particular weaknesses; I need to reread Elements of Style.

      Reply

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